Just about done with my medal drawing for the Nintendo Collab and I've decided to participate in the Grim Collab. This will hopefully help me get scouted again.

Yeah, it's making me very insecure not being scouted and when I was scouted some "glitch" got him and me unscouted again so I'm feeling low.

On the bright side, COLLABS COLLABS COLLABS.

Don't know what rule I broke but I'm not scouted anymore. This new system sucks.

Whooo, now I'm scouted again, thanks be to big-jonny-13 for the honor.

Now I can submit the pile of art that has been increasing, luckily they are better than my previous works so hoorah.

I want to upload new drawings to get scouted already, but I exceed the limit by far. How am I supossed to impress people enough to get scoutd when I can't put newer material up?

Also, I won two awards a long time ago, happiness from that doesn't cancel my current predicament though.

I always look at the art portal, it's become something of a source of inspiration.

I usually view by rating, and I'm pleased that people I know and that are clearly talented always make it in the top twenty or so pages, and I use these pages as a list f rivals.

Eventually, I'll be in their league, right now I need to learn.

I am too relient on my anime influence and lack classical knowledge.

You might thing "ART ISN'T A COMPETITION, IT'S ALL ABOUT EXPRESSION!" That is true, but if I don't see other artists whom just trumph my abilities, I'll feel more energy to focus on growth.

Complacency breeds apathy right?

Trying to draw another "Mad Hatter", in the sense I've been working on a few drawing in hopes they reach public appeal just as much or even more so than my "Mad Hatter".

One of these attempts is almost done, because I'm slow and have a busy schedule.

Until my computer is working I can't even get the files for my flash meaning it is very well, suspended indefinitely or at least on hiatus.

My computer died. I'm gonna see if I can recover some files. I desperately need my music, I need my FLA and I need at least my current PSDs if I can't recover anything then I won't continue working on my animation. I'll just put whatever my last SWF was and add the music, voices and what not.

I can't even upload the drawings I've done on paper...ugh

First time was because of Ego, now why am I unscouted? None of my scouts broke any rules, they were all rather popular portal members. I didn't break any rules either, all my art is original. I'm annoyed.

I can see why people like to do fan art, it's fun to take a personal spin to something created by someone else.